Is it? Could it be? Is it really Glinda, the Good Witch of the North?! No, even better!
Do you guys remember the horror with Time Warner Cable last week? Remember José and how he’s dead to me? Remember the angst? the woe? the gnashing of teeth? the making of chocolate pudding? Relive the horror, or live it for the first time here.
And now, in the immortal words of Paul Harvey, here is the rest of the story. I tweeted to any Triangle folks (Raleigh area people) to give me a good alternative to TWC for tv and Hinternet service. Well, @LeeRingerNews14, who is the local TWC channel’s weather dude tweeted and asked what was up. I directed him to the Post of Woe and Anguish, and he said that someone would be contacting me shortly.
So guess what? Somebody did contact me. (Huge Thank Yous go to @LeeRingerNews14)! First, I thought I was going to get to be on one of those David v. Goliath segments wherein the Little Person has tried and tried to get Satisfaction from The Devil TWC and then the Consumer Affairs Reporter (CAR, ha!) swoops in and writes a Nasty Note on the Little Person’s behalf and then The Devil sees the error of his ways and the birds sing and there are rainbows and then dancing. But then, my friend Steve, who is Very Wise, asked why in the Hell the TWC channel would do a segment about this Particular Issue. A poor strategic move on their part. So, I was brought back to earth (since I was already choreographing the dance dans ma tête). Thanks, Steve.
So, this is who I hear from: ::blaring of trumpets:: Patricia! Patricia is a goddess who, through no fault of her own, I’m sure, is forced to work for The Devil. Patricia is Reasonable. She is Understanding. Patricia Cares about me. This is how I know that she is being held against her will. Probably José has a key to the Executive Washroom, but they keep Patricia in a cell. Because they are Afraid of her Power. And what is her unique power? Excellent Customer Service. They roll her out at Opportune Moments, like when a Cheeky Blogger says less-than-positive things about The Company. I figure that they chain her to her seat and wrap some Kryptonite around her to keep her weak, but even so, she Works Wonders at the Behest of TWC.
Here’s what she did: first, she commiserated with me and agreed that José is Very Bad. I appreciated that; I like to have my gut feelings validated by goddesses. Then, she told me that I could have my Hinternets, still through Earthlink, set up and running on May 1!!! Remember May 1? It’s the day I asked the Nice Person to please schedule our installation. I told Goddess Patricia that Nice Person told me that she couldn’t schedule an installation until the other account was closed. And guess what Patricia said? “She’s right. She can’t. But I can.” Wow. So Patricia reached down into the TWC computer system and Bent it to her Will, so that now we will have The Hinternets when we need and want them. She is going to call me on the 30th just to double check.
Of course, I told Patricia that she is a goddess, and I got the feeling that she wanted to say, “Thank god that someone can see this! Please rescue me; I want to go back to Olympus!” Instead, probably because they bedazzled her shirt with Kryptonite jewels, she just smiled (I could tell) and said, “Thank you.” And then, I said, you are like Sunshine, and I will write for you a lemon pudding post. Again, she said, “Thank you.”
And so, Goddess Patricia, this pudding cake is for you. May it give you the strength to Bend your Bars and escape.
| Lemon Pudding Cake |
- 2/3 cup sugar
- 1 TBSP zest
- 3 whole eggs
- 4 yolks
- heavy pinch of salt
- 1/2 cup lemon juice
- 1/4 cup lime juice (secret sunshiny ingredient)
- 4TBSP butter
- 2 T AP flour
- 1/2 cup whole milk
- 3 egg whites
- 5 TBSP granulated sugar
- pinch of cream of tartar
- Whisk together sugar, zest, eggs, yolks and salt.
- Heat Lemon and lime juice and temper into egg mixture.
- Pour everything back into the pot and whisk over medium heat until thickened.*
- Remove from heat, strain and whisk in butter.
- Sift the AP flour over the curd and whisk in, along with the milk.
- Whip the whites, sugar and pinch of cream of tartar to medium-stiff peaks. Fold into the curd mixture.
- Spoon into buttered and sugared ramekins. Fill the ramekins almost to the top.
- Bake in a water bath at 325F for 20-30 minutes, until golden brown and risen and firm-ish to the touch. A little less than firm is fine–it is pudding cake, after all.
*A good way to tell when your curd is thick enough is that your eggy/citrusy mixture will be all foamy while you’re whisking. When it is thick enough, almost all of the foam will have gone away. This is a pastry magic trick, and I will probably be imprisoned for telling you this. It’s the least I can do, since Pamela is locked up and forced to wear Kryptonite slippers.
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